Daily Question, December 14 What are some creative ways I might approach a current conflict in my life? 46 Reflections Share Click here to cancel reply.Please log in or Create a Profile to post a comment. Notify me when someone replies to my comment via e-mail. Linda1 year agoLinda“Seek first to understand, then to be understood.” by Stephen Covey 0 Reply Elaine1 year agoElaineLet it be. Keeping clear boundaries has been my approach to a seemingly entrenched (9 years on) conflict between my two sisters. Letting go of any deluded notion that I have responsibility or power to affect it. Rather I focus on tending my relationship with each of them separately. 1 Reply Malag1 year agoMalagNice one. Has me stumped as good questions do! I’ll think on’t. 2 Reply Cheryle1 year agoCheryleReally learning to grow in (gratitude) and self compassion/ forgiveness for the things I have done in the past to harm myself and others from states of confusion and selfishness. 3 Reply Zenith1 year agoZenithThis is a hard one. I have several ongoing conflicts about which I can do nothing except try to learn from it. The best strategy I found so far is to stay very busy. So busy I don’t have time to dwell on the problems. The conflict does not go away, but the distraction of busyness seems to work well overall. 4 Reply Ose1 year agoOseMy mother´s whole perspective on a conflict between us since early childhood changed - and so did mine - when I managed to honestly tell her in a letter I wrote what I always appreciated and cherished in her. That I am deeply grateful for having her in my life and let aside all blame or reproaches or accusations, only focused on the essential good she owed and did to us. Her reply was deeply touching. She said she had to cry while reading and did thank me from her heart, which brought me to tea...My mother´s whole perspective on a conflict between us since early childhood changed – and so did mine – when I managed to honestly tell her in a letter I wrote what I always appreciated and cherished in her. That I am deeply grateful for having her in my life and let aside all blame or reproaches or accusations, only focused on the essential good she owed and did to us. Her reply was deeply touching. She said she had to cry while reading and did thank me from her heart, which brought me to tears; she said she always thought she had done all wrong. Our both hearts opened in this process. I would not consider it to be creative, but the letter created something between us which was not alive before, and all conflicts that stayed so many years and which were impossible to be addressed although I always tried to solve it with her, disappeared. They dissolved in compassion and forgiveness from both sides, the problems suddenly appearing so small and insignificant, compared to the loving kindness that opened up between us and simply took over. It was a gift of sorts, which dear friends had suggested.I am deeply grateful that this could happen and for the loving support from kindred hearts. So, in case of conflict, I most probably will try to relate with the essentially good in the other and then see what is left to be solved with probably both our hearts and good will involved. Read More5 Reply Cheryle1 year agoCheryleThank you for sharing that exquisite heart interaction between you and your mother it really is precious 🙏♥️ 2 Reply Dusty Su1 year agoDusty SuI am struggling with feeling a joy in my caregiving of my mother and being actually physically stuck in Australia. The best way I can approach either of these situations, outside of accepting not all of life is a joy, is to create a game/project/set of behaviours and thoughts around them to transform my attitude. 1. Before I step into my mother's realm, stop, pray, plan fun ways to be love to her. 40 seconds of mindful compassion before anything (a tried and proven method to avoid burnout for ...I am struggling with feeling a joy in my caregiving of my mother and being actually physically stuck in Australia. The best way I can approach either of these situations, outside of accepting not all of life is a joy, is to create a game/project/set of behaviours and thoughts around them to transform my attitude. 1. Before I step into my mother’s realm, stop, pray, plan fun ways to be love to her. 40 seconds of mindful compassion before anything (a tried and proven method to avoid burnout for doctors) for example. 2. See myself as not stuck, but having a wonderful opportunity to do, see, be in ways that I normally do not enjoy. Imagine when I leave Australia what would I miss and hopefully have had a lot of when here. Read More4 Reply Cheryle1 year agoCheryleI am so sorry that you are still in Australia when you desire so much to be with your Mum. Which state are you in? I live in Brisbane… 2 Reply Dusty Su1 year agoDusty SuHi, I am in Melbourne, and thanks for your kind words. Actually, I am with my mom, it’s not always easy, she has Alzheimers. Rather, I wish to be in Thailand, which was my home of 30 years. Or anywhere else, ha! But I do realize that this is an excellent opportunity to help my family, especially during the lockdown. 2 Reply Cheryle1 year agoCheryleThat must be very hard for you… I do hope you have some loving friends and family members you can share openly with when you hit a speed bump and who make you feel supported… I am originally from Melbourne and get homesick at Christmas… I usually fly “home” each Christmas but won’t this year. May you be safe, happy and healthy 🙏♥️🌠 1 Reply Dusty Su1 year agoDusty SuThank you. It’s slowly working out as I adapt and accept and look for the good. There is good. It will all be even better too 👍💕😁 1 Reply TofuLove1 year agoTofuLoveI think these are wonderful ideas!! You are doing absolutely fabulous x100, caregiving can be a toughy! May the sunshine be extra sunshine-y today for you (yes even in Australia haha!) 2 Reply Dusty Su1 year agoDusty SuThank you, that is so kind. I think I’ll have the sunshine today for sure, no less because of your kindness. Cheers and a big smile xx 2 Reply Don Jones1 year agoDon JonesLet go of right/wrong thinking, Sit with it and lean into the emotion so that it inhabits every cell of my being. Let go. 4 Reply TofuLove1 year agoTofuLoveWell one way is puppets. I act out situations that have happened with puppets. It allows me time to work out from various angles what happened and I explore various ways to respond. I actually look for puppets that look like various archetypes that I encounter daily, I might look for a puppet that is a snake to fill in for more antisocial types and then I can work out whatever it is with the snake puppet. I love it as it helps keep me from getting nervous or working anyone up into being this b...Well one way is puppets. I act out situations that have happened with puppets. It allows me time to work out from various angles what happened and I explore various ways to respond. I actually look for puppets that look like various archetypes that I encounter daily, I might look for a puppet that is a snake to fill in for more antisocial types and then I can work out whatever it is with the snake puppet. I love it as it helps keep me from getting nervous or working anyone up into being this big scary monster as the puppet allows me to humanize them and the experience … by communicating with the puppet them, working for solutions and going for some humor … it keeps me from becoming fearful which I view as something negative for my overall health. I think you can be self protective while also not being fearful of others or the world. I think the darkness is hate and fear, so I tend to avoid those things. One thing I notice is I really aim for inclusivity and a worldview that opens and is open to life and everyone around me. I think solutions are possible that take into account your needs and the other person’s tendencies that are peaceful, joyful and positive. Read More9 Reply Cheryle1 year agoCheryleI love it… so life affirming… 🙏♥️ 1 Reply Papilio1 year agoPapilioWhat a creative way your approach is! 5 Reply TofuLove1 year agoTofuLoveThanks! I appreciate this! I love your butterfly avatar!! 3 Reply Gicelo1 year agoGiceloAlgunas formas creativas pueden ser: agradecer el conflicto porque me ayuda a crecer y evolucionar, aceptarlo como parte de la realidad, ponerlo en perspectiva, buscar alternativas de solución que beneficien a todos los implicados y buscar acuerdos que generen concordia y armonia. 4 Reply Michele1 year agoMicheletranslation: Some creative ways can be: thanking the conflict because it helps me to grow and evolve, accept it as part of reality, put it in perspective, seek alternative solutions that benefit all those involved and seek agreements that generate harmony and harmony. 0 Reply TofuLove1 year agoTofuLoveThank you for posting this! It’s awesome to see different languages posted even if I don’t know what this says haha. 2 Reply Papilio1 year agoPapilioAlthough I doubt that it is a creative way, I use meditation and journaling as tools to enter in a witness state so that I can see a whole picture clearly without being emotionally involved. In this state of mind, I can watch myself just as if I would be someone else. 7 Reply Trish1 year agoTrishI can allow myself some time & space to sit with the conflict. I don’t need to figure it all out right now. I can explore the conflict & embrace the beauty that lies within it. I can remind myself that it’s just one beautiful life I have~stop taking it so seriously. ❤️ 8 Reply Mike S1 year agoMike SThere is a very present conflict in me at this time which is uncomfortable, and the one means of lessening the discomfort is through acceptance and letting go. 9 Reply sunnypatti1 year agosunnypattiMeditate. Pray. Journal. Then I take action – or not – based on whatever the situation is and whatever kind of guidance I have received. If I am at a loss, I will reach out to someone who I trust for help. I do also agree that sometimes we just have to let things be. That’s kin to letting go and letting God… 6 Reply Kevin1 year agoKevinAfter reading Michelle’s reply just now, it reminded me of this: I once knew an old, somewhat shrewd, old Quaker woman who would sit quietly amongst the elders in our Quaker Meeting listening to how best to address a conflict between two parties. After her contemporaries had all made their suggestions on the best way forward to address the problem at hand, she quietly stood up saying, “Don’t stir the turd, Friends, don’t stir the turd,” and quietly walked out the door. 13 Reply Trish1 year agoTrishWisdom 3 Reply EJP1 year agoEJPStop and truly listen from the heart. Look at every possibility and opportunity. Go forward with strength, courage and confidence. 6 Reply Pam1 year agoPamI write down the conflict , I journal about whether is bothering me and then try to let it go . I ruminate over the issue and need to let what ever it is that is the problem go. 4 Reply Kevin1 year agoKevinI can’t say that this is creative, but when conflict arises in my life the first thing that I try to do is determine who owns the problem. (I am a big fan of the term, “Don’t ride a horse that you’re not on.”) If the conflict or problem is mine, then I go to the other person immediately and address it head-on 6 Reply Pam1 year agoPamHow do you handle the other person without attacking them . 3 Reply Kevin1 year agoKevinI ask them to help me understand. “It seems we see things differently, and I’m hoping that you can help me to understand your point of view.” That way, I am listening, not attacking with my words, and I’m giving the other person a chance to speak more to the issue at hand. 4 Reply Michele1 year agoMicheleI’ve learned that some conflicts need to just let it be, ‘don’t stir up a hornet’s nest’. 7 Reply Kevin1 year agoKevinYou know, Michelle, your reply today reminds me of something: I once knew an old, somewhat shrewd, old Quaker woman who would sit quietly amongst the elders in our Quaker Meeting listening to how best to address a conflict between two parties. After her contemporaries had all made their suggestions on the best way forward to address the problem at hand, she quietly stood up saying, “Don’t stir the turd, Friends, don’t stir the turd,” and quietly walked out the door. 5 Reply Michele1 year agoMicheleaww, thanks Kevin, funny. by the way, I am a one ‘L’ Michele 🙂 0 Reply Kevin1 year agoKevinMy bad! Back in the late 80’s in my area there were lots of teens named Michelle, with two L’s. I used to run support groups for teens and I had a girl who everytime we went around the circle and the kids introduced themselves she said, “I’m one ‘L’ Michele!” You’re reminding me of all sorts of things, Michele, keep writing! 1 Reply Michele1 year agoMichelelol, I know that phrase well:) 0 Reply Holly in Ohio1 year agoHolly in Ohiohahaha… that’s perfect. That will stick with me. 3 Reply Pam1 year agoPamI appreciate what you have written hear Michelle . It helps so much . 3 Reply Michele1 year agoMicheleThank you Pam. I’m a one ‘L’ Michele 🙂 Welcome to this platform – it’s wonderful and very uplifting:) 0 Reply Howie Geib1 year agoHowie GeibBasically I write about everything. Having the options and issues articulated on paper allows me to begin to unwrap the options and in between the various scenarios, sometimes, a new idea or inspired solution appears. I try to get it out of the brain as there it never seems to get closer to being resolved. 7 Reply Butterfly1 year agoButterflyI do this too, Howie. It really helps to see things so much more clearly. A kind of thinking out loud. 3 Reply Pam1 year agoPamHello Howiie. I am new to this platform . I remember a few years ago I think I journaled in route to people. I like how you say you journal your feelings.After you write them down what do you do with them to re-read them are to burn them 3 Reply Howie Geib1 year agoHowie GeibHi Pam! So this action I wrote about is not necessarily journaling in a formal sense. I literally grab a piece of blank paper and get the issues down in a way I can see them outside of my head. That way, like looking at a puzzle and or a map I can see ways to move forward. At the end of the process the doodle scratch pad paper is no longer required so I can toss it. It is more about process than product, if you get my drift. 3 Reply Lauryn1 year agoLaurynYes- I have a similar strategy- get all my thoughts out on paper – read it over once – then tear the paper up and throw it away. 3 Reply My Private Gratitude Journal Write an entry in your private gratefulness journal Get Started This site is brought to you by A Network for Grateful Living, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit. All donations are fully tax deductible in the U.S.A. DONATE https://gratefulness.org/content/uploads/2015/03/GX-Gold-Participant-L.png Community Engagement Guidelines Privacy Policy [email protected] Connect with us on Social Media: © 2000 - 2022, A Network for Grateful Living Website by Briteweb