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Daily Question, April 12

Are there ways you have shown up less wholeheartedly than you would like? How might you change that?

  • Malag

    I had to look up a definition. It’s not a word I use. Def included “devoted determined and enthusiastic” and “complete earnest commitment”. On that basis rarely do I wish I was more wholehearted in situations. I prefer a bit more balance.

  • Hot Sauce

    Lately, I’ve been so focused on school, I’ve kind of gotten out of my running habits. I might change that by committing to run everyday. If that means some things get turned in a day or two late, then so be it. I really want to prioritize self-care.

  • delilah

    almost everyday, i really want to feel for people and care but its hard for me. i can dose off even when someone is having a face to face conversation with me because i find it hard to care. i really hate that about myself but noticing that i do this is my first step to changing that.

  • Melissa
    When someone just finds out they have a bad disease or someone dies that is important to them. I chicken out for a moment and wonder what I should say to show I support them and I am there for them. I just need to take a deep breath in my heart and mind and just push aside my worries ,if I will say the correct thing. Speak from my inner soul with more courage to listen and how to move forward to help that person. So I guess I leave my body and mind for a moment . So in the future I would like t...

    When someone just finds out they have a bad disease or someone dies that is important to them. I chicken out for a moment and wonder what I should say to show I support them and I am there for them. I just need to take a deep breath in my heart and mind and just push aside my worries ,if I will say the correct thing. Speak from my inner soul with more courage to listen and how to move forward to help that person. So I guess I leave my body and mind for a moment . So in the future I would like to just be present with them, have courage right then to be there for them.

    Read More
  • Don Jones

    I feel, the energy flows where my attention goes. So, if I am feeling halfhearted, it means for me that I am not giving my full attention. So, I give it completely. Paying attention is so important otherwise I will probably just be somewhere else..

  • Cathie

    At times I suppose…but usually if so, it is due to the physical challenges encroaching on the experience.
    Though I cannot change the physical, becoming aware of the encroachment will help redirect my energy to be more fully present!

  • John Tamminga

    One phrase that Br. David uses in his teachings is, “how may I serve?” Contemplating the meaning behind it has helped me with the motivation “to bless” and wholeheartedly indirectly happens more easily.

  • Toni

    Yes, yesterday I attended a seminar on line and I just listened and gave no input and did not ask questions. My one question was answered. It was the last question of the session. I was disappointed in myself for not participating more fully. Next time, I will ask questions and be more present.

  • Carol
    As I read everyone’s posts, I’m reminded of an old episode of “MASH.” It’s Christmas time in the camp and everyone is gathered in the mess tent. Boxes are Christmas decorations sit on one of the cafeteria tables but everyone is gloomy, feeling lonely, missing home and family. No one wishes to decorate. Colonel Potter walks in and surveys the situation and he says, “If you ain’t where you’re at, you’re no where.” I find that sound advice. To be wholehearted is not about perfor...

    As I read everyone’s posts, I’m reminded of an old episode of “MASH.” It’s Christmas time in the camp and everyone is gathered in the mess tent. Boxes are Christmas decorations sit on one of the cafeteria tables but everyone is gloomy, feeling lonely, missing home and family. No one wishes to decorate. Colonel Potter walks in and surveys the situation and he says, “If you ain’t where you’re at, you’re no where.” I find that sound advice. To be wholehearted is not about performance. It’s about presence. Some days we trudge. We can’t always skip, hop and jump and it’s okay. We can still be instruments of the grace that like our very breath is flowing effortlessly in the present moment. Life is now and the key is presence. Don’t fight, don’t flee, don’t freeze, just let it flow and be sure to give yourself a wholehearted hug today.

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    • Holly in Ohio

      I felt like you were speaking to me, Carol, because I guess it is just what I need to hear. What you said is quite beautiful. It has layers to it, about acceptance, peace, kindness to our self…

      You have given me much to think about. Thank you.

    • Trish

      Wonderful post, Carol🙂

  • Mike S

    I feel many times I’ve taken the safe or easy way out and have treated comfort for a more expensive life. Perhaps I have gone with the flow when I should’ve taken a stand against something but really didn’t feel right. In the Future with matters of consequence, I can be more diligent in holding to the truth but I know.

  • Gecko

    It varies depending on the demands of my day, especially with work related emergencies. I notice it is definitely tied into the level of energy I have at any given moment. And there is a turning back and turning inward as the pandemic goes on and on, to say nothing of the trauma all of us have in my town from the mass shooting. I guess all of this really has me feeling disconnected from me, and that I am simply like an organic machine remotely doing my tasks.

  • SK

    There are times when I feel less than there in the moment. My focus and energies seem to be elsewhere.

  • Patricia

    I’m showing up less wholeheartedly to this question and time on Gratefulness.org this morning. I have too much going on and have already had my personal quiet reflection, prayer and writing time. I guess each day has its priorities and some days I have to say “I choose to spend my whole heart on these other things today…”

  • Holly in Ohio
    Yes. Right now, I'm not "all-in" with the farm and other projects. I don't seem to have a lot of confidence or follow-through or even self-start, and I usually have that. I seemed to do fine last year with the shutdown and changes, despite the strain most people felt with the pandemic situation. I just "got on with it" last year, but this winter I think the Covid-world finally started catching up with me and I started slowing down as a reaction. Then a few weeks ago, something triggered my night...

    Yes. Right now, I’m not “all-in” with the farm and other projects. I don’t seem to have a lot of confidence or follow-through or even self-start, and I usually have that. I seemed to do fine last year with the shutdown and changes, despite the strain most people felt with the pandemic situation. I just “got on with it” last year, but this winter I think the Covid-world finally started catching up with me and I started slowing down as a reaction. Then a few weeks ago, something triggered my nightmares to return each night, so now I’m not sleeping well, either. I don’t feel depressed, but I seem to be doing a good impression of it.
    So, I’m pushing myself a bit to keep moving, half-heartedly doing my work, to get at least something done each day, but I’m very late on my sowing dates and other self-chosen projects, struck with indecisiveness each day, and not getting a lot done. This is so unlike me. I also wasn’t talking much for a while, except here. Even to my kids – so that was bad. Trying to make an effort now. I have been aware of this ennui and trying to figure out how to get things to shift… but I’m stumped how to change this because I don’t really understand why it came in. I welcome suggestions of things to try to get movement again!

    Thanks for putting up with my whining this morning. I know I’m really so lucky, I’m not having to face what so many of you must deal with on a daily basis (healing, illness, loss of a loved one, etc.), so I feel like I really should not complain. But I would appreciate advice. Thanks.

    Read More
    • Michele

      Was the losing of the books what triggered the nightmares? I remember you mentioned you found the bag they were in. You can try a relaxation meditation before you go to bed. Ask your husband to give you a massage before bed. Sending you some peace and calmness:)

      • Holly in Ohio
        It was not, Michele. I'm not certain, but I think the nightmares started upon hearing my daughter has again chosen an unhealthy relationship. My husband and I want to talk with her about it, and we're not sure, but we think she may be dodging us for the moment. She let us know in a long email where she tried to explain everything was all right because they were in love. We're pretty sure she knows the relationship isn't right, because she's been keeping it completely secret for quite a while (th...

        It was not, Michele. I’m not certain, but I think the nightmares started upon hearing my daughter has again chosen an unhealthy relationship. My husband and I want to talk with her about it, and we’re not sure, but we think she may be dodging us for the moment. She let us know in a long email where she tried to explain everything was all right because they were in love. We’re pretty sure she knows the relationship isn’t right, because she’s been keeping it completely secret for quite a while (this only came up because we needed her house number), and she’s been keeping it secret that she’s been living with him for some time and not living where we thought she was. She’s trying to justify the relationship… but keeping it secret, too. I think the nightmares came because I know this is beyond my control, but I know she’s in need of psychological help.

        Wouldn’t I love it if my husband would give me a massage? Lol. But the meditation is something I could do. I have a nice guided meditation tape that I could play, and I have been massaging my own feet with lotion and that feels good. I take it you have some experience with nightmares, too. I’m so sorry. I found the books, by the way!

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    • Christine

      Dear Holly, I feel sympathy for you. 💞I also had to push myself forward after my husband passed away. Please do this “pushing” as kind and sweet as possible to yourself.

    • Mica

      You’re facing more than I am, Holly in Ohio – no need to apologize [to me] 😊

    • Rita
      I have no advice Holly but I certainly hear you. My choice of words is 'funk'. And I've been there lately. I attribute it to fatigue -it's been a year of shut down and my spirit wants change. It's a hard place to be in but I accept it as a phase of the times, part of me I don't like, one more part of me I dislike but believe that this too shall pass. I read somewhere that the Dali Lama says to put a smile on your face even when you don't feel it, fake it till you make it. Some days my smile is r...

      I have no advice Holly but I certainly hear you. My choice of words is ‘funk’. And I’ve been there lately. I attribute it to fatigue -it’s been a year of shut down and my spirit wants change. It’s a hard place to be in but I accept it as a phase of the times, part of me I don’t like, one more part of me I dislike but believe that this too shall pass. I read somewhere that the Dali Lama says to put a smile on your face even when you don’t feel it, fake it till you make it. Some days my smile is real and some days it’s a fake. Sending blessings and good energy – Rita.

      Read More
  • Javier Visionquest

    Showing up wholeheartedly not a problem.
    Showing up with a <less-than pancreas, though. . .

  • devy

    To be wholehearted in everything one days is difficult. We are human. There are so many distractions both positive and negative that interfere with this idea. By my continued training and work on daily meditation, thankfulness and making a conscious effort eventually being wholehearted in everything may become a final destination.

  • Trish

    For sure there are times when I show up in a distracted state. There’s an element of holiness when we give our undivided attention to someone or something. It brings richness to the entire experience. Striving for those experiences keeps me on my toes.

  • sunnypatti

    Oh, for sure there are! I am but a human, so while I always want to be my best, I’m just not always 100% into something. I find this happens in conversation with others sometimes. And I notice it. I see myself drifting away from being present with another, and then I redirect myself to pay attention. That’s the best I can do. Noticing helps keep me aware and reminds me that I still have – and will always have – work to while I am in this body.

  • Howie Geib
    I am struggling through the documentary “Exterminate All the Brutes” on HBO. I could hardly sleep last night. It, along with my deeply held opinions about our destruction of the planet, has truly shaken me. I am not convinced I know if there is a direct correlation from my feelings and some direct action. Knowing on the visceral level that I do thanks to the film, I cannot fathom something won’t shift. Precisely I am not sure though. Knowing something intellectually is one thing, really ge...

    I am struggling through the documentary “Exterminate All the Brutes” on HBO. I could hardly sleep last night. It, along with my deeply held opinions about our destruction of the planet, has truly shaken me. I am not convinced I know if there is a direct correlation from my feelings and some direct action. Knowing on the visceral level that I do thanks to the film, I cannot fathom something won’t shift. Precisely I am not sure though. Knowing something intellectually is one thing, really getting it, and seeing its perpetuation in our lives today, is terrifying.

    Read More
    • Matthew E

      Dear Howie, I have read a few of your reflections and I can tell you are a very mindful person. The case that is presented first always seems right until it is cross examined. Your fear may be well founded, but it is also possible that it is not when it is held up against cross examination. I pray your soul would find peace my friend.

  • Michele

    Physical tiredness definitely has an impact. Trying to get a good nights sleep, exercising more, quiet time/mediation all can help your mental status to be sharper/clearer so that you’re able to give wholeheartedly to whatever. Body, mind, spirit all working together:)

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