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Daily Question, December 2

How do I show my respect for others? How is it a mutually fulfilling gift?

  • GCharlotte

    Having respect for others I may hold them in high regard while also when in doubt I may look closely and while waiting for the knowledge give them the benefit of the doubt.

  • Laura May

    By offering them the same treatment that I would expect to receive in return. I listen, I am patient, I offer kindness. This is mutually fulfilling as it leaves the other person feeling validated and respected. Hopefully, they are then more willing to offer the same.

  • Malag

    How i act generally shows either respect or disrespect. I f I act with integrity and from a “do no harm” outlook in everything I do then to a large extent the respect for others automatically flows. I will engage with others where my actions come from the right place, I will be fair, treat the person as my equal, listen, honour my commitments etc. And starting with the “I” and working to the “you” means it is mutual.

  • reality
    Beautifully chosen questions; studying them more deeply can clearly delineate the necessity of the answers in our world today. There is a route, rote of political correctness that is necessary in measure and reserve, traditionally used to address historical to current egress, etc.; allowing perspective to inform our behaviors and communications in those regards. Yet, we live in a nation of extremes, even seen in our younger generations contorting through to deforming themselves in a plethora of...

    Beautifully chosen questions; studying them more deeply can clearly delineate the necessity of the answers in our world today. There is a route, rote of political correctness that is necessary in measure and reserve, traditionally used to address historical to current egress, etc.; allowing perspective to inform our behaviors and communications in those regards. Yet, we live in a nation of extremes, even seen in our younger generations contorting through to deforming themselves in a plethora of varied ways to ‘get ahead’, ‘be and show talent’, ‘have a competitive edge’, make enough $ to exist through to successfully defend themself and live well, etc.; in quite unnatural through to self-destruction means to their ends. Of course, ‘to each their own’, ‘que sera, …’, etc., yet, as this community does, “…we(e),…” can effective work towards re-kindling the evolution by struggling against the corporate structure’s convolution’s devolutionary direction’s programming of people. To that end, my answers are aimed. Naturally, by human growth and relation (which life is), we treat everyone respectfully; yet, not as a product of supposed left intellectual projections like, “everybody should be respected”. For, the intellect can’t lead, as the life doesn’t follow. A good rule of thumb, as all here may be aware, is treat one as you would have them treat you; unless one is otherwise informed by someone’s behaviors and/or communications, etc.. As well, it’s spiritually possible to still respect one whose abusing you or just being obnoxious, while also defending oneself from them; probabably a preferable path. Yet, I wished to bring up a point that might add hue to the conversation. I don’t know about the rest of you, yet, I’ve experienced that the truth is seldom spoken, the rule of taking one’s golden silence all the way to the bank, for decades straight, if not life, if considered concretized. And, of course, the more one walks that path of ‘least resistence’, at minimum ‘going along to get along’, etc., they tend to ‘put blinders on ‘, ‘only go forward’, ‘mind their business’, ‘not put their nose into other peoples lives’; which leads to pathological ‘white lying’, mental ‘departmentalization’, pathological lying (why tell a truth when you can lie), pathological extreme lying (why tell any ole’ lie when you can extremely lie every time)- motis operendi such as ‘ignorance isn’t just bliss’, nor ‘next to godliness’, but, rather ‘all’, etc.(extreme means to extreme ends, defined and determined necessary by the wordly world). Life as relation must be honored, i.m.h.o.. For e.g., almost no one in my personal life has honored me with the truth. Yet, in my latest 45 of my 60 years, as an activist/advocate on all issues for all life and the Earth, I’ve been honored with the truth enumerable times; thank goodness. How I respect others mostly is by honoring them with the truth; they may not like it, they may disagree 100 %, that is choice- my choice is to honor them. Of course, “do unto others as you’d have them do unto you’, ‘know thyself’, etc., informs the ability to discern other perspectives like, people only deserve the rights, liberties they afford to others. Ergo, if the death penalty weren’t racist, classist, sexist, ageist, it would be a fair remedy; actually nonviolent- for ending a murderer’s life stops them from murdering again, as they might, at least in prison. This concept that ordinary life and/or human behavior is a process of continually ‘gifting’ isn’t true. It’s ordinary behavior, not some kind of spiritual genorosity; more is usually less. The fact that the ordinary has become extraordinary because of the devolution of human behavior doesn’t change reality an aota. As well, all words don’t mean what notsees project they do, ‘do as they say or else’. All words are their own paths of study, and either you are or you’re not studying. For e.g., projecting people ‘should, or even must, forgive’, is detrimental to self, the other and society at small and large. For, feelings, and the thoughts that they’re based on, have a centering in reality. Convenience doesn’t further, perseverance does. If you forgive a person who hasn’t stopped the behavior towards you and/or others, are you really forgiving, or is it one of the ’50 shades’ of cowardice most citizens find essential to meeking out their little corner of ‘normalcy’, ‘contentment’, ‘happiness’, ‘success’, ‘accomplishment’, ‘mastery’, ‘bliss’, etc.? Thanx for all you do. Have a great day ? reality

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  • Butterfly

    I show respect for others by treating them as I would wish to treated; with love, kindness and understanding.

  • Ose

    Through non-discrimination. If I see you in me and me in you, in Gassho.

  • Hot Sauce
    I've been wrestling with the messy issue of forgiveness lately because my beliefs are being challenged by my learning in seminary. Based on my thinking and reflecting about non-problematic ways of approaching forgiveness, one way I can show respect for others is to hold myself to an ethic of forgiveness. After all, it will let me empathize with and humanize those who have wronged me. At the same time, I can also show respect for people who do not want to forgive by not imposing this standard on ...

    I’ve been wrestling with the messy issue of forgiveness lately because my beliefs are being challenged by my learning in seminary. Based on my thinking and reflecting about non-problematic ways of approaching forgiveness, one way I can show respect for others is to hold myself to an ethic of forgiveness. After all, it will let me empathize with and humanize those who have wronged me. At the same time, I can also show respect for people who do not want to forgive by not imposing this standard on them. Some people are in a place of deep pain and hurt, and we can respect them by, perhaps, hoping that they will eventually forgive or even praying that reconciliation and/or forgiveness can happen, but without forcing them to do so or saying insensitive things like, “You should just get over it” or “You just need to forgive.” For both of these ethics, there can be mutually fulfilling gifts. When I forgive, I heal my own feelings of pain and humanize/show empathy toward those who wrong me. At the same time, by not forcing others to forgive, I allow them to be where they are in their hurt or anger without re-victimizing them by trying to force them to get rid of their feelings and am also reminded to be patient with myself if I don’t feel forgiving. It’s a process, and I can’t beat myself up if I don’t get it right the first try.

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  • Tom Denham

    View every person as my teacher and mirror. Each person shows me me as a mirror and every person has something to teach me.

    This concept seems to be all about me, but in practice it means that I take other people seriously. And if I want my mirror to show me a jerk, I can be rude and have a good chance of seeing that shadow displayed. I just heard the teacher/mirror concepts last week and I am focused on them now.

  • Elizabeth M Jones

    Seeing Jesus in each person I meet. Greeting, looking in the eyes of the person I am with, showing respect in the words I choose and in my thoughts..

  • sunnypatti

    By remembering they are on their own journey. By actively listening to what they have to say. By being present with others.

  • Ann

    One way I show respect is when I am actively listening to another, and in so doing, I receive the gift of being fully engaged in a connection with the other, be it person or animal.

  • Tom

    I try to show my respect to others by allowing them to find their own path toward peace. It is natural and well intended to try and “fix” someone, but this is different than helping someone get in touch with their own inner resources that lead to self-acceptance and wisdom. Of course there are times when we need to physically hold another’s hand and help them along, but respecting another’s unique human experience creates a mutual connection.

  • Carla

    I too, as shared by several posts, listen to the other(s) I converse with. As I work with multicultural communities, I would add that I add a language interpreter by phone, rather than guess what’s needed or being said. Mutually we are both “heard”; I follow through what’s needed as best I can. (Today I head back to work post knee surgery 2 months ago). Am Grateful for healing.

  • Verena

    if trust is mutual, gifts and offerings ? – expressions of respect and reference – are seen as such ?

  • Ed Schulte

    The ‘Word of the Day’ addresses a pure way of “showing respect” ( both to others as well as one’s self ) by way of the words, “Strive to be uncynical”, MARIA POPOVA

  • Michele

    I also agree with Kevin … in addition I also will hold open a door for someone, remind my son to take off his hat/cap in a restaurant (I remember this from my Pop-Pop), I respect co workers opinions/insight, depending on someone’s culture taking shoes off before entering their home. Having learned respecting others from my mom/grandparents set an example for me as I hope it does for my kids:)

  • Antoinette

    I show my respect for others by listening to them and trying to be helpful. I show respect by being open minded and mindful of how I act, speak and think. I try to be thoughtful and kind.

  • Mark Piper

    I show respect for others by not only listening but by following through on that listening; if I say I’ll do something about the problem that was shared, then I need to follow through on that. I suppose it is mutually fulfilling by way of building trust, trust which is a two-way street.

  • Kevin

    I show my respect for others by making eye contact; by using their name; by saying hello and asking them how they are doing; by making an effort to listen longer than I speak; and by remembering the phrase, “Be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle.”

    I am not concerned about what I get in return. That seems to take care of itself.

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