Daily Question, August 23 How has my meeting someone halfway cultivated understanding, connection, and appreciation? 34 Reflections Share Click here to cancel reply.Please log in or Create a Profile to post a comment. Notify me when someone replies to my comment via e-mail. Mark Featherstone1 year agoMark Featherstonemeeting halfway, we have moved together with honesty and compromise knowing that all Truths are but half Truths. 0 Reply Debra1 year agoDebraI wish it to be so. Have we really met each other half way? 4 Reply Arleen1 year agoArleenWhen you meet someone halfway, you both lose something. Neither one gets their way entirely. It is a way to move on to understanding what is important to both parties. Doing so strengthens the bond between the two and allows for the relationship to continue. My experience with this is with my husband. Many times we didn't and don't agree on something and by giving a little and getting a little we are able to live our marriage with mutual respect and love. Most of the issues are not the big...When you meet someone halfway, you both lose something. Neither one gets their way entirely. It is a way to move on to understanding what is important to both parties. Doing so strengthens the bond between the two and allows for the relationship to continue. My experience with this is with my husband. Many times we didn’t and don’t agree on something and by giving a little and getting a little we are able to live our marriage with mutual respect and love. Most of the issues are not the big ones, but picky little things that can get under your skin. I learn more about what my husband likes and I am able to appreciate his wants and needs. Read More2 Reply KC1 year agoKCThanks Arleen, I appreciate your down to earth words. Marriage for me is also a place of practice, just as you name so beautifully, ?? 2 Reply Dusty Su1 year agoDusty SuBy doing so, I abdicate the unbearable burden of being the center of the Universe and join the beautiful dance of humanity. I see divinity in the other. I begin to understand love! I have started to pray this prayer more often during COVID Chaos, and It helps me with meeting others halfway too. Mary Mrozowski, “The Welcoming Prayer.” Welcome, welcome, welcome. I welcome everything that comes to me in this moment because I know it is for my healing. I welcome all thoughts, feelings, emot...By doing so, I abdicate the unbearable burden of being the center of the Universe and join the beautiful dance of humanity. I see divinity in the other. I begin to understand love! I have started to pray this prayer more often during COVID Chaos, and It helps me with meeting others halfway too. Mary Mrozowski, “The Welcoming Prayer.” Welcome, welcome, welcome. I welcome everything that comes to me in this moment because I know it is for my healing. I welcome all thoughts, feelings, emotions, persons, situations and conditions. I let go of my desire for security. I let go of my desire for affection. I let go of my desire for control. I let go of my desire to change any situation, condition, person, or myself. I open to the love and presence of God and the healing action and grace within. Read More4 Reply KC1 year agoKCDusty Su, This is beautiful and so helpful to be with what is … Sincere thank you! ?? 1 Reply Dusty Su1 year agoDusty SuThank you KC, it’s a hard one, but a good one. 0 Reply Michele1 year agoMicheleI have a hard time with letting go of security and affection. I’ve been single for 4 yrs now and so miss affection. I love giving affection and miss receiving it. Appreciate your posts:) 4 Reply Dusty Su1 year agoDusty SuAbsolutely understood Michelle. I am affectionate, its how I show and receive love. Even in my work of three decades in Thailand, it involved a lot of holding, touching, and closeness with others. I was single for seven years, met my boyfriend a year ago, and became an item in the states when I was there for three months, we have not been in the same space for over two months now. It's very hard to not be together or to know when we will be again, it's very hard to not reach out to help another,...Absolutely understood Michelle. I am affectionate, its how I show and receive love. Even in my work of three decades in Thailand, it involved a lot of holding, touching, and closeness with others. I was single for seven years, met my boyfriend a year ago, and became an item in the states when I was there for three months, we have not been in the same space for over two months now. It’s very hard to not be together or to know when we will be again, it’s very hard to not reach out to help another, it’s very hard to be in isolated lockdown in a country in which I feel lost. Hence, very little security. It’s even harder to pray this prayer, but somehow it helps. Because while I have no control over any of it much, I can pray to let go of the need to control, which oddly gives me some control, or at least a say in it, ha! I wish you well, I wish you love, affection, and great security too. I wish it for us all! So, my prayers seem to be in opposition, but they are not I believe. Ultimately, it’s a “help me to let go of these things, may the need for them take a break, help me to trust, but also, may we all have them met in good, healthy ways, and in the perfect time.” I wish you well dear heart… Read More0 Reply Cathy1 year agoCathyOh, thank you for posting this, Dusty Su. This one I need. ?️ 2 Reply Dusty Su1 year agoDusty SuMy pleasure ?❣ 1 Reply Don Jones1 year agoDon JonesIt means that the focus is on “yes”. Everything becomes, yes. A life of yes to life and living. 3 Reply Hot Sauce1 year agoHot Sauce"OOOOooohooh OOooohoooh I can't go any further than this!" Sorry. Had to. Anyway, we have had to learn to meet my dog halfway by learning to think like a dog. We and the cat are at the top of the pack hierarchy; Tuck is submissive to us. If he does something we don't want him to do, we have to make him do it. The cat eats before he does, and he doesn't get to make noise unless we allow him to. Doing this has helped his aggressive behavior a lot, and he actually seems to enjoy the structure a l...“OOOOooohooh OOooohoooh I can’t go any further than this!” Sorry. Had to. Anyway, we have had to learn to meet my dog halfway by learning to think like a dog. We and the cat are at the top of the pack hierarchy; Tuck is submissive to us. If he does something we don’t want him to do, we have to make him do it. The cat eats before he does, and he doesn’t get to make noise unless we allow him to. Doing this has helped his aggressive behavior a lot, and he actually seems to enjoy the structure a lot more than when we used to spoil him and treat him like a human. Read More2 Reply KC1 year agoKCI appreciate Jess’ reframe, of hearing and respecting another person’s perspective. I am not sure how useful it is to look for a measure of halfway, except perhaps over time. In a healthy, open relationship of trust, understanding, connection and appreciation seem to flow more easily. In a less healthy, less functional or higher conflict relationship, the meeting of hearts and minds can look quite different. In my experience one person often does the ‘meeting (ie. far more than hal...I appreciate Jess’ reframe, of hearing and respecting another person’s perspective. I am not sure how useful it is to look for a measure of halfway, except perhaps over time. In a healthy, open relationship of trust, understanding, connection and appreciation seem to flow more easily. In a less healthy, less functional or higher conflict relationship, the meeting of hearts and minds can look quite different. In my experience one person often does the ‘meeting (ie. far more than halfway), which allows the other party to respond in kind as best they are able. Far from ideal, for sure. Yes, conflict resolution. Sigh … Read More4 Reply Linda1 year agoLindaMany years ago I heard the phrase, “Would you rather be right, or happy?” Being angry at or disappointed in someone takes a lot of energy. This phrase helps me when I can’t seem to get past something someone said or did. 5 Reply 1 year agoThanks Linda, during the lockdown some old friends disappointed me and I felt angry for a few days. So far a bitter memory lasts …. you’re showing me a door to shift my attitude, like Carol some post below. Now I have to open the door and I know that being in this community is a good start. 3 Reply Antoinette1 year agoAntoinetteNo one is perfect and when we continue unrealistic expectations we get hurt or disappointed. When I meet loved ones and all beings with understanding it helps to see we are all much more alike than different. We all want love and happiness. We don’t want suffering. Connection and appreciation happens when we let go of expectations. It’s a lot easier to surprised when we let go of expectations than always being disappointed about people not meeting our demands . 5 Reply Linda1 year agoLindaThis is so true, Antoinette. 1 Reply Zenith1 year agoZenithI don’t think I have ever met anyone halfway. At least I don’t think so. My life experience is that we are all very selfish and if I don’t meet someone where they are at, nothing will get done. Perhaps that is being negative. But the truth. 3 Reply Mica1 year agoMicaInteresting point, Zenith – indeed, my neighbor came halfway when I finally connected happily with her. We were talking about Things, and she said there was something about ‘one person’s trash’ and I said, ‘one person’s trash is another person’s treasure’. We are both ‘treasure’ people, despite the many ways we are different. It was a great breakthrough for me, with my neighbor of 8 yrs! 2 Reply Michele1 year agoMicheleThe important word in this question to me is ‘halfway’. both people need to meet halfway, if one is the only one making any effort it’s pointless. I appreciate the ones who do connect with me. 3 Reply Katrina1 year agoKatrinaThis is a very helpful thread on the topic of conflict resolution. I’ll be following… 4 Reply Carol1 year agoCarolWhen I moved here over a year ago, I met a woman who has become a friend.I observed how kind and caring she is toward others. However, we totally disagree when it comes to politics and when she breached that subject, I told her that I could not agree with her but that didn't mean that I did not appreciate her as a person. I told her I had witnessed her acts of kindness and admired the way she lives her life and that her friendship was important to me but that I could not agree with her politics....When I moved here over a year ago, I met a woman who has become a friend.I observed how kind and caring she is toward others. However, we totally disagree when it comes to politics and when she breached that subject, I told her that I could not agree with her but that didn’t mean that I did not appreciate her as a person. I told her I had witnessed her acts of kindness and admired the way she lives her life and that her friendship was important to me but that I could not agree with her politics. Basically, we agreed to disagree and the subject of this year’s election is off the table. Meeting someone half way does not require agreement in all areas It does require acceptance of what I can’t change. It’s never good to throw out the baby with the bath water! Read More7 Reply Mica1 year agoMicaThanks, Carol – I’m impressed that you addressed your concerns with her without damaging your friendship. When someone made a statement that annoyed me this month, I just bristled instead of asking her more about it. I wish I had asked her where she had heard what she said. On the other hand, in Zoom groups that can be hard.. … Thank you again Carol – I have just asked my question on a site that should be able to answer it. 2 Reply Carol1 year agoCarolI agree. I have experience some Zoom sessions and that dynamic is very different from the one on one sharing I had with my friend. 1 Reply 1 year agoThanks Carol for your reflection because it is really helpful, even in another country and in different circumstances. It is not easy to come to your wisdom, but your words are an encouragement for the first step. 2 Reply Carol1 year agoCarolThanks for your kind words. 1 Reply Michele1 year agoMicheleYou have such grace and poise with your answers and they always make me smile:) 2 Reply Carol1 year agoCarolWhat a lovely compliment. Thank you! I’ve always heard that a smile is a form of meditation. Probably because in that moment we are practicing Presence! 2 Reply Melissa1 year agoMelissaBy being myself and being respectful they were comfortable enough to trust enough to just be themselves. 4 Reply Howie Geib1 year agoHowie GeibI am aware that there is a conditional way these positive feelings can be manifested. It is if the condition of generosity, a willingness to share and a sense of the needs of all are taken into consideration. This is not, at least in my experience, the norm. Often I am involved in transactional relationships where the other party is insensitive to my letting go of some expectation or claim to something of value. So the ingredients for this to have outcomes like appreciation, understanding and co...I am aware that there is a conditional way these positive feelings can be manifested. It is if the condition of generosity, a willingness to share and a sense of the needs of all are taken into consideration. This is not, at least in my experience, the norm. Often I am involved in transactional relationships where the other party is insensitive to my letting go of some expectation or claim to something of value. So the ingredients for this to have outcomes like appreciation, understanding and connection I have to know that my letting go of this portion of whatever I think is mine is appreciated, and the other way around. It is making sure that gratitude is present on both sides for the willingness demanded. Without this the potential, at least in my fairly weak humanity, is to develop a tinge of resentment. Read More3 Reply devy1 year agodevyBy bringing peace to all parties. Meeting someone half way is a form of conflict resolution. As they say, you have to be willing to meet people half way. If you expect everyone to meet you where you are, you’ll be there alone. 5 Reply Kevin1 year agoKevinWhenever we truly listen, and communicate our differences, goals, and needs with another human being, something shifts, and moves each party to a new and different place, that is generally seen and feels “better.” Realistically however, achieving a measure of “understanding, connection, and appreciation,” for and about the other party is usually a bi-product of a deliberation or negotiation, and was not a primary goal of initial engagement. We wanted something, we needed something, and t...Whenever we truly listen, and communicate our differences, goals, and needs with another human being, something shifts, and moves each party to a new and different place, that is generally seen and feels “better.” Realistically however, achieving a measure of “understanding, connection, and appreciation,” for and about the other party is usually a bi-product of a deliberation or negotiation, and was not a primary goal of initial engagement. We wanted something, we needed something, and the only way to make that happen was to meet the other person or party halfway. Read More6 Reply Jess1 year agoJessIn my experience, when you’re willing to meet someone halfway which I interpret as “respecting and hearing their perspective” that inevitably encourages them to reciprocate that to you. Kindness breeds kindness and meanness breeds meanness. A great deal of the time, you’ll get what you give. 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