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Daily Question, January 13

How do I cultivate gratefulness within myself and with others?

  • Dusty Su
    By making it a habit. Each evening before sleep, I scan the day in my mind for three highlights. Then I break one of them down into bullet points. This trains my brain to search out the good, and to find meaning throughout the day, every day. After 21 days, it becomes a habit wherein your brain is placed in a positive detective mode. This practice also helps me fall asleep with gratitude. I rarely get to make the bullet points though, ha! As far as cultivating it in others goes, I find c...

    By making it a habit. Each evening before sleep, I scan the day in my mind for three highlights. Then I break one of them down into bullet points. This trains my brain to search out the good, and to find meaning throughout the day, every day. After 21 days, it becomes a habit wherein your brain is placed in a positive detective mode.

    This practice also helps me fall asleep with gratitude. I rarely get to make the bullet points though, ha!

    As far as cultivating it in others goes, I find complimenting them, or asking what their day’s highlight has been so far, often brings out positive responses. If they are going through heavy stuff, I compassionately listen without judgement, (as best I can,) then may add if appropriate at the end, “So, what would your next step be considering this situation?” This may help empower them to seek solutions of their own making, while feeling supported. A positive step towards gratitude without saying something such as, “Cheer up, keep your chin up, be thankful…” which is not usually helpful. Even if they do not have any next steps, that’s okay too! Maybe they can be thankful that I journeyed with them through trails. I know I am grateful when someone offers deep listening, genuine care, concern, and yet believes I am capable to find my way through difficulties.

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    • Holly in Ohio

      thank you, Dusty Su! I’m going to try the evening thankfulness starting today. I can also try those tips to help others. 🙂

      • Dusty Su

        People know more than they know. Providing a safe space, often helps them reveal what they really want to do or be.

        I would love to know how your evening practice goes, Holly. All the best.

  • Don Jones

    By paying attention to the details as it is often the small things that make big differences.

  • Ose

    Writing in the morning about what for I am grateful, exercise to sense it, allow it to rise; especially on days like this one where for several hours, all other but gratitude swirls around in me, then listening compassionately to the ones I encounter opens the door to gratefulness again; to read and to reply here on this site; When I rant like a Reed Sparrow like today, taking a moment, may be talking to a friend and opening my heart again is balm and gratefulness just flows in again.

  • Cynthia

    To cultivate and grow gratefulness I take a moment in the morning to write a statement on how I plan to live my day. Today I plan to be grateful for all of the ways I move my body.

  • Helly

    I find meditating often helps me to see things with a more grateful heart – particularly on days when I’m ill or feeling negative emotions. Living in Now not in future dramas or past hurts. I fail very often, but i keep trying!

  • Linda

    I am aware of all the blessings in my life and I do not take them for granted. I give thanks throughout the day.

  • Lauryn

    By practicing gratefulness and intention every day. By being mindful of your actions and living in the present. Focusing on today. Awareness. With time, practice gives way to habit.

    It’s much easier said then done. Today I will pay attention.

  • Gary Gruber

    Start every day with the attitude of gratitude, for the gift of a new day waiting to be received, opened, embraced and celebrated. Grateful for the opportunities to be and do better, share and care. Reach out to someone every day with love and appreciation.

  • Papilio

    I cultivate gratefulness within myself by daily practice as I know how easy it is to start falling away from the path of grateful living. When I’m practicing gratefulness, without any particular reason people around me seem to become grateful.

  • Ed Schulte

    Knowing and living within the truths of the Attained Ones yields boundless gratefulness ….no matter what the current state of humanity is…

    “Nothing is confused in the Universes, within Divine Total Wisdom, Total Power and Total Love and Goodness. Confusion exists as a phenomenon in the thoughts of human beings, but it is a temporary phenomena. DASKALOS

    This is also expressed as, “This too shall pass”.
    And so it shall be “Gratefully” accepted when humanity is ready for it.

  • Holly in Ohio
    Awareness and interaction are very helpful tools in becoming more grateful. I remember when I first felt more grateful for coffee, it actually tasted better! I have a favorite cup, it now has a chip in it but when I use the cup I still actively look at it, even the chip, and smile. Making the coffee has almost become a ritual, the heat of the filled coffee mug in my hands, smelling the coffee before I drink it, all of these things and more require being present and interacting with what is ar...

    Awareness and interaction are very helpful tools in becoming more grateful. I remember when I first felt more grateful for coffee, it actually tasted better! I have a favorite cup, it now has a chip in it but when I use the cup I still actively look at it, even the chip, and smile. Making the coffee has almost become a ritual, the heat of the filled coffee mug in my hands, smelling the coffee before I drink it, all of these things and more require being present and interacting with what is around us in a very conscious way.

    I like the “with others” part of the question. Of course I try to comfort and cheer others, but are there ways I can help others find gratefulness more easily? I will need to “sit” with this question today.

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  • Butterfly

    I cultivate gratefulness by coming onto this website every day. When I talk to others I express my gratefulness for them and for what I have or the things around me and hopefully that sows the seed of gratefulness in them.

  • Carol

    The serenity prayer is helpful. It reminds me that there are things I can and can’t change. Also, not labeling things good or bad but seeing all as an opportunity to learn and grow. Eckhart Tolle teaches cautions about turning situations into problems. I find that advice helpful and visiting this site, reading others answers to the daily question, reading the articles offered and listening to the videos from Br. David. I am grateful for it all.

    • Holly in Ohio

      The serenity prayer is helpful for everyone, and I often think of it.

      …”turning situations into problems.” Now I can hear my mom saying, “Don’t go borrowing trouble!”

  • Mike S

    I will stand and really be present with my wife today and tell her how much I love her. I will cuddle my key and feel the warmth of connection. When I go to the café for coffee I’ll smile at the barista. And in each instance I know I will feel how fortunate I am and feel grateful. I can think of this as practice, but to me it’s just immersing in the goodness life has to offer. In other words am I doing gratefulness, or is gratefulness doing me?

  • Patricia

    Practice, practice, practice.

  • Trish

    I work my gratefulness muscle everyday. It takes effort & a commitment to keep it buff & ready for action. When I share my gratefulness on the regular other people start to get in shape too. It’s contagious even while wearing a mask!

  • Kevin

    I recite aloud throughout the day how grateful I am for the many things and positive circumstances in my life. When others around me hear this it’s an invitation for them to consider the same.

    • Howie Geib

      Thank you…I think modeling the behaviors we aspire to see in others (inspiration) is a noble and worthy cause!

  • Howie Geib

    For good or ill we live in times that seem to see life as a series of transactional exchanges. So by investing every fiber of my being into generosity, others tend to not come away feeling used and therefore gratitude is possible (such as in my work: helping with luggage, asking if the temperature in the car is good, driving cautiously). My surviving these times seemingly unscathed is more than enough to justify gratitude.

    • Mike S

      Thanks for the specifics Howie. Our love of life lives in small, daily gestured.

    • Kevin

      “My surviving these times seemingly unscathed is more than enough to justify gratitude.” – Perfectly stated, Howie. Thank you!

  • EJP

    Cultivate gratefulness by choosing to have a positive attitude every day and finding the silver lining in everything, then pass it on to others with a smile.

  • Michele

    I cultivate gratefulness within myself by participating on this site daily. I let my family and friends know I care by making sure to communicate and let them know how much I love them.

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