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Daily Question, October 13

How can I make a positive difference for someone who is suffering?

  • Katrina

    Food is always a good introduction to the opportunity to smile, say something, be silent or just sit with – the 4 S’s.

  • Ose
    In so many ways actually, so much one can do depending on the situation at hand, but what I found is reducing someones suffering a lot is to be fully present with all my heart and to listen deeply (even if not physically present, calling someone for example), so that they are heard, as suffering is often related to a feeling of loneliness or disappointment or a feeling of being deserted in one or other way. If appropriate and ok with the other, to help finding ways to reduce the suffering. Praye...

    In so many ways actually, so much one can do depending on the situation at hand, but what I found is reducing someones suffering a lot is to be fully present with all my heart and to listen deeply (even if not physically present, calling someone for example), so that they are heard, as suffering is often related to a feeling of loneliness or disappointment or a feeling of being deserted in one or other way. If appropriate and ok with the other, to help finding ways to reduce the suffering. Prayer and sending light with the intention for healing to someone who is suffering might be very helpful also.

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  • Howie Geib
    To carry the burden with them. This can be as simple as acknowledging their suffering. Seeing it. Recognizing the sense of their having the endurance required to make it through. Not by making attempts to fix it, however certain I might be that I could. This does not mean inaction on my part. Simply a sense of maintaining enough room for their dignity to remain intact. Suffering has many sources, and sometimes multiple causes interlocked. The complexity itself is overwhelming for the sufferer at...

    To carry the burden with them. This can be as simple as acknowledging their suffering. Seeing it. Recognizing the sense of their having the endurance required to make it through. Not by making attempts to fix it, however certain I might be that I could. This does not mean inaction on my part. Simply a sense of maintaining enough room for their dignity to remain intact. Suffering has many sources, and sometimes multiple causes interlocked. The complexity itself is overwhelming for the sufferer at times. So offering a hand, someone to lean on, a bit of light in the dark to help get over some tricky patch of ground is my most common approach.

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  • sunnypatti

    By being present 100% with the person and listening to what they have to say. And if they don’t have anything to say, just being there with them. Holding their hand, lending a shoulder, giving a hug. Praying for them and praying with them.

  • EJP

    Walk beside them and be their friend.

  • devy

    Just by being there, listening, offering a hug , praying for them..

  • Patricia

    Listen without judgment. Show up.

  • Dusty Su

    I believe that a very important factor in making a difference in a person’s life is by returning as much power to them as possible. To meet them on their terms, help with their needs, not as I see they ought to be, but as they see them. Empty hands and an open heart is my policy. Take out of my hands everything I think I know, would like to achieve, win trust by working with what they place in my hands. Of course, this must be ethically balanced.

    • Holly in Ohio

      I deeply appreciate your guidance in this, Dusty Su, as I know you have much experience in comforting and serving those who are suffering. Thank you so much!

      • Dusty Su

        Walking at end of life, with those in pain with life, having been in great pain myself, are great teachers. Thanks for your kind words 🙏

    • Katrina

      You are a very wise woman, Dusty Su. I want to follow you around and learn from you.

      • Dusty Su

        Learned often by falling flat on my face. As it goes. As I say, as I lay in the dirt, looking up, I discovered some of the greatest miracles in my life.

  • ashleydoyle

    Loneliness amplifies suffering. If you want to make a positive difference for someone who is suffering, let them know that no matter how dark it gets, you will always be there.

  • Christine

    By being a caring friend 🤗💞💐.

  • Kevin

    Contact this person with a call, handwritten note, or better yet when possible, a personal visit.

    If the person who appears to be suffering is unknown to me, at the very least I make an effort to acknowledge their existence with eye contact and a “Hello,” and as it seems appropriate in the moment, “Can I help you?” Other times, I may pick up some food and coffee for a person who’s hungry, or reach into my wallet and pull out a bill. And yes, it is never enough.

  • Michele

    Prayer and/or lighting a candle.

  • Carla

    I consistently find that whether I’m asked to or not, engaging in the act of listening to another’s physical, emotional or spiritual pain assists in their healing. We all need another to respectfully hear us and our story.

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