What I regret most is the kind of hidden haughtiness I felt towards others. Although it did not hurt openly, it clearly would have hurt others if it would have been visible. Not to let it appear does not make it better. I can only humbly apologize towards the ones concerned. For this to not let it happen again, it requires to understand and to love.. To punish myself is no solution but an expression of something. I just saw a short video of Br. David, where he conveys: Fear not – meaning: do not resist, instead cultivate friendliness. A really peaceful suggestion, offering help, and I will try to do so.

To honor my heart´s whisper, I should give it an expression. Related to my own, I can only say that I am fully and most gratefully committed to what I started in the groups I was allowed to join and in some writing I have done about the same theme, which is about “meditation with substance”, trying to support the magic that life holds for the sake of helping to unfold consciousness, love and freedom as best as I am able to, together with kindred hearts, to hopefully helping to realize it for the sake of all, God willing. For this I pray with all my heart.
A day full of intensity lies ahead. With love, wishing all a sunny day, a blessed day, you all out there.

Witnessing the miracle of our family working all together to realize a necessary change, while before, each of us was living seemingly apart but for the sake of creating something new, all came to bring in their talents and strengths to make it possible. My sister cooked a meal for all, my other sister made the necessary structural arrangements, my nephews and nieces brought their friends to help build the connections for communicating. All senses involved! I could do my part, and even some of the neighbors were willing to join in to clean and to carry what needed to be moved, only to make it possible. Our free commitment arrived in this “joint venture” and made it easy and pleasant to work together as a whole just in a flow and with good moods. So grateful for this inspiring experience right now.

Hello dear friends, so grateful to have the opportunity to share here with you. You are an example to me in communicating honestly and with a kind and open heart, so I, being a kind of “newbie” here, will try to do also, as to let you know and share some more of myself.

Another stumbling stone in addition to panic and fear has been a clear but hidden haughtiness towards others. I could assume it is related to the already mentioned panic, a kind of compensatory defense mechanism due to very early life-threatening attacks almost on blood level, but I am not sure if I could plea for this or if it was just genuine to my personality. It was, and it was unjust towards the ones concerned. On my side, it lead to a feeling of isolation and being deserted for many years and an inability to allow and to stand real closeness, as one probably can imagine.
With all this, and despite the awful state, I was helped. Undeserved, and it still brings tears to my eyes in deep gratitude towards the ones concerned. A long way to deep healing and still work in progress. Please let me say thank you dearly, to real guiding angels and to the universal love as well as towards you all here who share in this kind and positive way. It is a huge contribution to gain awareness in many levels, but most of all I feel you all here belong to a humble community of kindred hearts. Please allow me to apologize towards the ones I have silently maltreated. May blessings be with you all who join here.

There is something may be even more important for the moment being, which I try to express in short. Relating to the word for the day, as “reality” mentioned already, the purpose most close to my heart always has been to support increasing awareness, loving kindness and developing freedom. All aspects which I myself still have to develop also. I deeply fear to be estranged and isolated from loved ones and this is my stumbling stone so far. Concerning my purpose, it might be that I am lead to facing it directly now, feeling like someone who is in agony due to fear of the dark, who challenges himself to stay a night in the woods with all kinds of possible wild animals to overcome it. May universal love guide me to face my inner threatening tiger. Please pray for me.