The enthusiasm of a young man whom I had the pleasure to meet this afternoon was inspiring. We talked about his seach for meaning and truth in exploring what kind of contribution would be of service for his fellow people.
Most probably the posts of yours expressed here, which I have not yet read and to which I am looking forward to. They are always inspiring to ponder on and invite to allow being touched and possibly being inspired to change inner perspective. The variety of replies is a gift to all, I guess. I am grateful for your contributions every day. When I open the computer in the morning, visiting and reading your comments is inspiration for the day and a real joy most of the time. Thank you all, dear friends.

This morning I nearly was in despair as the many current and chronic duties seemed to be overwhelming by now. Then for some reason I looked into the planner and saw that this morning, I will be off for the first 2 hours and all afternoon! It left me relieved. Lucky me! I was taking a deep breath, relaxed and came back to the moment, grateful for sitting comfortably present on my sofa with my first coffee in the morning. I will observe the sun rising and will listen consciously to the birds singing, announcing spring.

Please excuse my long post, if you would be willing to read to the end of it.
I cannot recall a situation where showing vulnerability shifted a difficult situation. I can only recall situations where I exposed myself, felt vulnerable and then it went into a disaster. The worst was after the first sexual contact with a man I fell in love with. He belonged to a completely different culture and while I was hoping somehow to be merging in love with him, he just tested my still be virgin or not and that was it. Then a colleague of him whom I knew just superficially came to the pub where I had met him and said that I now would be the wife of this man, as I had proved to be virgin to him. It was terrible for me to have been approached in public by a stranger about this intimate moment in such a disrespectful way.
Some weeks later, a woman went to my parents, saying I could take her husband and in addition their three kids also, as her husband would only drink alcohol by now. He had never mentioned that he was married and that he already was father to three kids, probably knowing or sensing that then, no further intimate contact would have been.
About a year later, when I finally had managed to open up again towards men, I had spent an evening dancing with my boyfriend, when the former “lover” appeared with a knife, threatening my boyfriend and me, saying that I would be his.

Probably, such stories are less rare than commonly thought, as it is extremely painful to confess such trauma and the resulting difficulties arising from it to open up to a loving relationship. Any comments, provocations or ways of being belittled related to my inability, which to some extent is lasting until today, has been extremely painful. So if you want to know about my most vulnerable “secret”, this is it. I am aware that the disaster to a large extent was due to the extremely different culture we both had been imprinted by, and in this sense, no one is “guilty”, but knowing this did not alter my deeply hurt feeling and my relation with men have been difficult latest since then. Does it alter something to express it here? I don´t know. May be. The question led to share it with you, trusting somehow that it will turn out to be ok. Happy Easter, you all who visit and who share here.

As some already mentioned, the gift of life given by God; my parents, being gifted by them with some talents, allowing to being able to bring them in for serving my fellow people. Through my dear parents, perseverance, the ability to work a lot and to process things in a disciplined way as well as inner strengths like reliability, honesty and so many other gifts that possibly serve the life of others and my own also have been transmitted and for all I am deeply grateful. Beloved friends have and still do teach me how to not give up, and when sometimes the light almost is dimmed to nothing, to find back to love. It is a gift of sorts to connect through the heart with all of you here and with my dear friends and loved ones, for which I am forever grateful.

As the day started with an urgent telephone call, I was very happy to have had this service available, someone or a group of unknown fellow people constructed the phone, provided the line and the energy to make it work. I feel just this so well established technical device is of huge support for all of us. Or as for lunch today, I went to the bakery which offers a salad, a carefully prepared mix of delicious vegetables, tomatoes, asparagus, carrots, grated radishes, salad made of corn and salad made of eggs. There was a queue of people waiting for to take the opportunity to buy something for lunch. I don´t know the ones who prepare it in the back of this bakery, but I am very grateful to have the opportunity to go and just buy it, may be find some more space to relax in the sun during the break and then go on refreshed in my daily work.

For a long time I almost did not know other than living up to imprinted set standards of expectation, with an arrogant entitlement of an assumed extraordinary life, similar to what has been mentioned by Matthew E. In this mindset, the other people and also me had good chance to land up in a role associated with judgment and other mechanisms where good or bad, better or worse, wrong or right, so polarity and duality were leading principles. Then I saw that beyond this, when really looking closely, underneath there was helplessness, difficulty to find orientation inside my own and not so much of some already formulated authentic contribution, which would come from my heart and not from my “doing” to create together how we could best live together in this world, led by the heart. Currently, it is work in progress to detect the residues, which belong to these old habits of mind and to transform all into a peaceful and joyful state ready to share with others in the best way possible. I am happy and deeply grateful to have the chance and so much support of many dear kindred hearts. This by now is on its way to change inner perspective and to open up inside to the deep joy to possibly living a life blossoming in humility, humbleness and gratefulness, being there and giving and sharing with an open heart..

Thank you dear Holly in Ohio for your compassionate post. Already during the course of the day, after having found the courage to be visible with my shame and pain and again while trying to reply to you who were so kind to speak up or reply to it, the pain has lessened to quite some extent, and I guess most probably this is due to having allowed to be seen vulnerable in one of the deepest wounds, encouraged by the question and the kindness which is present by all of you who share here. At present, it feels to me that this is one important step to let go of the old pain. Thank you for your wishes. Happy Easter to you also, my dear friend.

Thank you, dear Howie, for sharing your painful experience with us and your very sensitive and heartfelt response to it. It helped me as well to feel less alone with having exposed myself that much today. I am deeply grateful for your contribution. To convey the way you have met the insult in the way you did and that you could keep your integrity and fine ethic sense and awareness despite the huge pain and feeling of vulnerability allows me and us to learn from it, of possibilities in how to respond to such deep running abuse. Thank you for this huge gift of yours.