In short, letting go of anger & resentment changes ME.

I grew up having an alcoholic mother, so I was ripe with anger & resentment.

As I worked some steps to get through all of that, anger, resentment and a whole host of other feelings faded away. In their stead, compassion and understanding rise to the top.

As a result of that work, I came to have a good relationship with my mother in the years before she died.

My mother didn’t change; for all but the last 3 years of her life she drank. I was the one who changed.

I held her hand as she passed from this life to the next.

I have a couple of tools that help me do this:

Remember when I point a finger at someone, 3 more are pointing back at me.

Sweep off my side of the street: in other words, make sure my motives are pure.

Ask myself these 2 questions: does it need to be said? Does it need to be said by me? That can be tricky, especially when the answer to the first question is YES, but the answer to the 2nd is NO.
And lastly, a nightly review of my day, which I often don’t get to since I fall asleep in the living room chair! Lol

Right now, we are going through a rough patch. My 90 year old dad is hospitalized for only the second time in his life. My brother, his caretaker, is really the only one who can visit him (Covid restrictions, plus he knows his meds, daily routines, etc better than anyone).
In addition to that we have we oldest sibling who is an alcoholic and who cannot be relied on.
Today, I am grateful for my brother and all the work he is doing. I am also grateful that he knows he can rely on me to back up any decisions he has to make or to provide any assistance he needs.
Today, I will try not to focus on what my sister can’t do, and instead be grateful that I have an opportunity to live my authentic self.

I am literally doing this today. My father just came home from the hospital and is immunocompromised. I have been part of his pandemic pod until now. Working in daycare, I have the privilege (lol) of wiping noses. Yesterday, half the kids called out with colds!
So while I delivered groceries to Dad yesterday I couldn’t go to see him because of my exposure.

Last night, I started with the sniffles! I got an opportunity to stay home from work, so I grabbed it.

I’ll try to stay outdoors to give myself fresh air today.

Every morning before I answer the daily question, I look at all of your responses. All of you have been helping me understand what is being asked. Thank YOU!
Like some, I look back on what I’ve been through and exclaim, “Holy moly! Look at all Ive been through!”

Like others, I call on Christ.
I, too, hope for the best and prepare for the worst.
And I constantly look out for new tools to add to my toolkit, so I will have to find out more about the Resiliency Bank Account!

This was a recent issue with me. For the last year or so, there is one little girl at work with challenging behavior. She challenged all of the staff, but she challenged me in particular. So much so that my boss sent me for training. I welcomed the opportunity!
During the training I realized one thing about myself: I was using tactics that worked better for the other staff, but were contrary to my values. This girl picked up on that.
The training validated that my values are correct, and it also helped me to implement them.
As a result, the child’s behavior has improved and my sanity has been restored.