In 2004, I bled to death. I was alone in a foreign country without resources. The supposedly terrible event was one of the best experiences of my life. I was very angry when I was sent back. I tried to leave my body again and couldn’t.

My two main takeaways, among the many, were:
1. Dying is easy, living is the hard part. But live fully until you die.
2. Because I was created by Divine Love to be loved, love, and then BE love, so was everyone else.

My finitude opens to vast spaces, so does yours.

Yes, both positive and negative…

Positive: the most amazing transformative way to see and experience life. A real health bringer, both mentally and physically. A wonderful community creator for contagious joy, too.

Negative: formerly based on “Praise God” for everything, ended up being “paste a hallelujah bandaid” over really tough stuff that needed recognizing and even exposing. It was dangerous and came back to haunt me big time. Detrimental for well being on so many levels.

Answer by a better balance practice: I now recognize the tough stuff, let it speak to me, learn from it, grow through it, put it in place, ask God what he/she really thinks of the situation, then transform it through assigning it proper meaning. This brings eventual genuine gratitude and a bridge of compassion for self and others! Much healthier.

I am struggling with feeling a joy in my caregiving of my mother and being actually physically stuck in Australia. The best way I can approach either of these situations, outside of accepting not all of life is a joy, is to create a game/project/set of behaviours and thoughts around them to transform my attitude.
1. Before I step into my mother’s realm, stop, pray, plan fun ways to be love to her. 40 seconds of mindful compassion before anything (a tried and proven method to avoid burnout for doctors) for example.
2. See myself as not stuck, but having a wonderful opportunity to do, see, be in ways that I normally do not enjoy. Imagine when I leave Australia what would I miss and hopefully have had a lot of when here.

Thanks Cheryle, and to you too this beautiful Season.
Ha, yes, I was mad about being made to return. But well, I do grasp at life too many years later, I also realize how I could savor it more. I do not waste it per se, but I do not savor it enough always. One thing that helps me is I post photos a lot, or short writings, on Facebook and I view them daily on my memories app. That is up to 12 years’ worth of memories each day. It is a wonderful thing to see what I have experienced and appreciate them all over again, sometimes more in the passing or loss of them. Especially when seeing memories of times shared with those who have died, or places I have left. This makes my life richer. Reminiscing richness an excellent tool.
With Love “n” Laughter,
Dusty

Recently the Queen’s Gambit (loved it)
The Queen season 4 (liked it a lot)
The entire 17 seasons of BIg Bang Theory. Finally got to watch it. Yes, that’s a lot, ha! I am on the spectrum and it is one of my compulsive joys, and puts me to sleep without being too stimulating.
I’ve also been watching some Australian movies/series to give them a chance. Reasonably good, a bit slow, but must say getting better quality. I love that there are more powerful women and indigenous people featured as leads or strong characters. When overseas I see nothing Australian, nor do I seek it out much, but I have been thankful to do some catchup. I have some great independent movies, documentaries, classics and indigenous from all around the world, at 10 free a month online under my local library. So, watching those too.
With all that said, I have returned to reading at night too before sleep. During COVID Displacement, I had no mood for it, which is so odd for me. I am glad to be back.
How about you Pam?