All the times I have spent in nature. A vacation on Vancouver Island with its beaches, awe inspiring forests, the mountains and whales and other sea creatures to watch is especially prominent in my mind. Or Sprucewoods Provincial Park where I took my shoes off to walk through the warm sand, saw a multitude of beautiful butterflies and prairie flowers. When my memories go to those places I feel calm and reassured that everything is as it is supposed to be and always will be even when I don’t see it that way.

So many people here have given me new perspectives, reminded me to look closer, go deeper and, of course, to see and find so, so many things to be grateful for, even the ones I don’t notice and take for granted, or especially those I take for granted. How often have I read comments here and thought, “Wow, that never occurred to me! How could I have not seen that?” These comments are gifts to help me grow, to shift my focus, to think outside my box. Even though I have not met any of you I often feel a bond and that makes my life brighter and my burdens lighter. Thank you!

At 68 I would say I’m much more relaxed about things. My experiences have (hopefully) taught me a thing or two but there is still lots to learn. Although I still work (I love my librarian job) I now put enjoying every aspect of my work (and life) over perfectionism. So what, if the collection is an infernal mess after a school class visit? As long as everybody had fun during their stay we’re good. Messes can be cleaned up (in the library and in life…everything is in constant flow, things always change). Like butterfly I have a chronic disease and like Kevin I am often in pain and even though I can not say that I am enjoying this more than if I had bypassed it, it has taught me to look for the happy moments, to be patient, to have compassion more often than not. When I can do and be those things I feel great joy.

“You cannot get through a single day without having an impact on the world around you. What you do makes a difference, and you have to decide what kind of difference you want to make.” Jane Goodall
This quote came to my mind immediately when I saw today’s invitation to reflect. Reciprocation requires my full attention, my time and willingness to learn and to be what I already am, a part of nature. To reciprocate means to not go against nature in a futile and illusory effort to control or exploit it without consequence. It means to immerse myself in it, become one with it. That is the only way I see to do right by nature and honour its generosity.

I once had a “vision”. In it I saw forests being burned down, lakes being drained, oceans covered in oil and all kinds of destruction of the surface of the Earth. It was heart wrenching and I cried and asked, “What can I do? What can I do?” The answer, strangely enough, was, “It’s okay. Everything is okay.” I did not understand. How could this be okay. Then the next “wave” came and I saw animals suffer terribly. And again I received the same answer to the same question. Somehow at this point something started to get clearer, though. And after the third part, in which I saw the suffering of humans all over the world, I felt that I had a better understanding of the answer I had consistently received. For me it was to sit with the pain, to fully experience it and not fight it because suffering is one part of life. And that is okay. I don’t need to jump into action out of desperation and pain. After fully letting it wash over me and infuse me it will, strangely enough, fill me with calmness and peace that then can radiate out into my immediate surroundings and ripple into the world easing some suffering. Everything is okay. It is as it is supposed to be, even if I do not understand why. It motivates me to cultivate this calmness inside me so that my actions may be prudent and deliberate.

Agreed. The part of me that could be the best myself cleaned the inside of the car and planted a hydrangea today. Tomorrow the best myself will hopefully maw the lawn and replant some peonies and then sit in my garden and listen to the birds, the sound of the leaves in the wind. And if my cat joins me on my lap he will think that I am being my best self by making him purr. I will also think of Hermann’s musings on being one’s best self because he gave me the best answer to the question I had no answer to. Thank you, Hermann. 🙂

Carol, I really like your mentioning of the serenity prayer. We always seem to associate aging with all manners of decline and while that might be more prevalent in old age it can happen at any age. There can be accidents, medical mishaps, chronic illness. genetic defects and so much more that can befall a human being. In fact I feel that with all the potential adversities out there it is a real miracle to be alive. Sometimes wisdom is also attributed to aging. Well, age does not protect from acting foolishly and I know young people who are wiser than me in some aspects of life. In other words age is just a number. Wherever we find ourselves on our journey accepting what we can not change is one way of honouring ourselves as is changing what we can and knowing ourselves well enough to distinguish between those two options according to our abilities independent of age.