Wow…yesterday and many days for me, especially first thing in a.m. are so frightening and often I don’t want to come out of the cocoon of sleep then or ever again. I try to check in with my daily Gratefulness.org email and any new blog posts here. I came thru yesterday with a break in the internal darkness around 6 p.m. which was late in this frequent journey I take. In trying to learn acceptance of fact that this condition will be with me for the rest of my life, I try to sit with it even on more challenging days before resorting to meds that usually help for a time but are only a bandaid. The real answer is in finding gratitude, gratefulness for the ineffable miracle of life in all forms and transcend the immediate “difficult”, painful experience, be grateful for lessons it brings.

Today’s message and this blog post particularly helped me face this morning’s fear. It is my dearest wish to also be able to live with boundless optimism as does Laura Grace and others here but any optimism is so slow in coming. Still, this blog post so embodies the practical experience of today’s daily message and it is helpful. It is warming. Thank you.

I’m sorry to be such a “downer” in comparison to so many of the blog postings and the comments I read here at Gratefulness.org. But I don’t know *how* to get to a place of gratitude in the face of really very scary things in my life and I am alone, aging and have no family/friend support system.

This is a marvelous blog post. To quote one passage: . “I have slowly started to shift my attitude from the anger, fear, and loneliness brought on by the Parkinson’s and the grim predictions of a Parkinson’s future to a more body-based feeling of gratefulness for the wholeness of life as I experience it second by second.”

But *HOW* … where did the fear and anger go? What exactly does one do to slowly shift focus to gratitude?

So many blogs and comments on this site do the same thing – talk about “embracing” gratitude or “have come to learn the way of gratitude” and the resulting balance that has ensued.

My life situation is one of being in the midst of losing my home to foreclosure after spending 15 yrs as a solo private practice pro bono litigator protecting the indigent from illegal attempts by giant banks to collect money from people in court without *ever* having sufficient proof that my client owed anything. I worked so hard and so long going days and weeks with little sleep bcuz there was so much work on my plate that I finally had stress-induced mini-stroke and was forced to retire.

How does one go from where I’m alone in the world, facing such scary stuff, have major depression episodes and then just start to develop gratitude.

Please help me understand how it’s done, how that magical path is actually embarked upon,..PLEASE…

Thk u for listening… and for this wonderful blog post.

Dear Sheila,

I had never heard/seen that quote and it is so warming and gentle. Thank u so much. Im wondering how one gets such warming ways of looking at things, or the world in general, to sink into their heart and their self, their being from their head…much less how gets to a place where they generate for themselves and then can share with others such concepts like Ram Das or Br. David. Maybe it’s not something one “wonders” (like in their heads) about but something one feels instead. Thx for sharing, tho. It’s very enlightening. Maybe I need to learn better how to practice staying out of my head so much. Much love and appreciation.

Thank you SO MUCH Serafina. Ur reply was so kind and gentle. I am not accustomed to being treated in such a way perhaps bcuz I’ve unwittingly isolated so much apparently in an attempt to protect myself.

I will review the sources you so generously list here as soon as i possibly can. Thank you and I guess u r right, I’m starting to “get it” about practicing gratitude. That is, I see how thankful I am, how I “SO MUCH” appreciate that anyone even noticed, much less so kindly and helpfully, lovingly replied as what I see here and with other replies after yours.

I need a way to replenish my self-parched soul to become increasingly grateful, to develop a practice, a daily lifestyle of gratitude and begin to truly see all that is truly around me in Nature, in being as much as possible in Pesence (ie, Tolle’s words in today’s Gatitude daily posting.

Thank you… I am ‘grateful’ for ur help here and even more telling, I’m finding a way to trust here a bit again. Namaste & blessings be yours. C